Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Stuck in a moment

It has been exactly 1 month since my father died. You would think that the pain would ease up, but it doesn't. I miss my dad terribly and I absolutely hate this whole ordeal. When I look around and see all the sadness in the world and I know that I am not the only one that feels like this, it makes me feel worse. I hate to feel like this, but I also feel sorry for everyone else that is struggling in this hard world. I know there is a lot of good in the world, but I definitely feel like I am stuck in a moment.
I used to have the song by U2 "Stuck in a Moment" as the ringtone for my cell phone. I loved it when my phone rang and I would hear.......

I'm not afraid
Of anything in this world
There's nothing you can throw at me
That I haven't already heard

I'm just trying to find
A decent melody
A song that I can sing
In my own company

I never thought you were a fool
But darling look at you
You gotta stand up straight
Carry your own weight
These tears are going nowhere baby

You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And now you can't get out of it

Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it

I will always miss my dad and I will always feel the sorrow but I can definitely work on my attitude a bit and get myself together even though I am stuck in a moment.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

This is how I feel!

I know I should probably have something better to say but I am not quite there yet. Today my sister Stephanie found out that she will be losing more of her hair than she thought from the radiation. Some how that does not seem very fair, but again LIFE IS CRAP. My mom thinks life sucks sounds better, but I am sticking with crap. I definitely need to start working on my attitude because my father is probably looking down on me right now and shaking his head. Well Dad, Life is crap sometimes!

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Farewell to the Best Dad Ever.

My dad past away June 20, 2008 from pancreatic cancer. It is hard to put into words the devastating feelings this has brought to me. Grief is a feeling that brings so much sorrow. I will miss my dad immensely and the important part he has played in my life. He was someone I could always count on no matter the circumstance and never judged.He spent his life serving others and will be remembered for the wonderful man that he was. I love you Dad and I hope you are at peace.